Dan Mayer's Blog

As the reality of Erin leaving sets in I find myself saddened and quite in a dark place. It wasn't as if I didn't know this was coming. It isn't as if I haven't been prepared to be apart for 4 1/2 months while she was in Honduras. I know this was something important to her and that she needed to do for herself. I know that it will give me time to do some things for myself that I have wanted to do. I still sit here feeling a incredible sadness wash over myself. I mean the last year of my life seems to have flown by, and with many big and sad events happening in my life I still find that I am probably in the best spirits and the happiest I have been in years and I know in a large part that is because of being with Erin.

It is funny that in many ways we are so different and have different goals, thoughts, and beliefs, but in the end we are so incredibly compatible that we seem to keep each other in balance normally featuring the best of both of us. She calms me and makes me take moments just to enjoy the world. A step back to appreciate all that I have. In this world we are so incredibly lucky, there is little I have ever be left without, my hardships are limited, and I am left open to try and accomplish anything.

So many have so little and such little hope, facing scary health, political, and other problems that I have been lucky enough to avoid. Erin actively goes out of her way to not only be aware of people in need of help, but to try to do something about it. She doesn't just go and volunteer, she pays to actually go out and make a big difference. She respects all that she has been given and has a feeling that she must share and spread the luck and life that she has. I am in awe of the things she does, says, and thinks. Hopefully I can always be worth part of her time and energy.

So while our paths my spread for a short while in time as we both walk alone. I know our paths lead in the same direction and will cross again. So Erin I love you, best wishes on your journey, share your spirit and joy of life with others, and I will see you soon. I will keep you in my heart and thoughts.

When words fail you...

Erin and I in Mexico together.

Together at Dom and Nicole's wedding.

Awww doesn't she look cute sleeping after a night out with the girls.

Erin loves it when I ruin pictures by making faces...Was funny when I was two and it is still funny now.

Erin and I at the top of a hike in Vail.

Erin has safely arrived in Honduras. I received my first email. I also learned that all the computers were set up to use Firefox in Honduras go open source!

I frequently get asked why I support the EFF, as it was time to renew my membership today. I found some good info on the site to help explain that.

Reasons why bloggers should support the EFF

There are many others as well, but I figure that gives anyone a good start if they care.

I am not really against having more people come work in this country. I am against some of the ways companies do this. Bill claims Microsoft can't find enough highly skilled workers and they actually have to pay more trying to bring them in with H1-B visas. The problem is that these leave a paper trail to tell more of the truth... The claim is they are highly paid and highly skilled position the truth is the majority of the hires are actually entry level programmers... Remember all the CS students coming out of college saying they can't get a job, yeah. Also, see how MS has some of the highest levels of applicants ever year out of CS companies? See how they reject people like myself who generally are actually more highly trained than entry level programmers coming out of many other countries (we tend to have more real world experience with actual development time). So basically while I will agree there is a overall hard market to get programmers, but not for one of the biggest companies there, which is preferring to hire this young people, because they are more controllable, cheaper, more willing to work unfair hours (60hours a week is common work hours in many of their countries). If you make your case for more visas, your claiming I am not highly skilled enough. Some simple programming tests could prove this not to be the case. So I say it again, bite me Bill.

I can't get enough employees in the US, Bill Lies about use of H1-B visas.

Over all I think they should be able to hire and bring people in from other countries, but I don't think we should be increasing the levels for a few companies at the top that are ignoring large parts of the local hiring pool. If you think you need students trained in certain aspects of CS better around here start investing and lobbying for better education. Not a way to help sink our education system further behind. Your claim of getting non entry level workers is debunked by your own paper work.

So I have been trying to take care of various tasks today. Hopefully I accomplished some, and shrunk my ever growing and large to do list. I removed and added some new pictures to the random picture rotation at the top so enjoy whats new...

Well Erin happy Valentine's Day. It is weird to have a girlfriend to share this holiday given the many of my memories of this day. I remember getting together with a bunch of other single disgruntled guys and going out, I remember feeling incredibly lonely. I remember missing relationships of the pass and wondering about relationships that may come in the future...

I guess it is a little bittersweet, I am happy, I am not lonely, I do miss you and think about our future. Really it is all good things, except it is still a day that I am sure will be filled with little awkward thoughts instead of spending it dreaming away about what will be... or just focusing on the current moment.

I will probably work extra hours because I will be in a big empty house alone, then I will come back and relax. I will raise a glass of wine to you and cuddle up with a blanket to watch a movie. Then I will lazily return upstairs to my bed to fall asleep dreaming with images of you filling my head.

So what to give a girl who is 2068 miles away? Who to live life, learn, and help others spends her own time and money? I guess all you can offer is some time and money of your own towards their goals and beliefs.

I decided that I needed to make a donation to a charity helping out in Honduras, as it seemed to be the only right gift to help your little mission. Unfortunately many were mostly trying to spread religion more than healing. I found some smaller local ones, but it was hard to tell if many of the organizations were still running when the site hadn't been update for over a year. Then I stumbled on to this site, projecthonduras.com is an online portal for information on ways to help Honduras. Which in turn lead me to a group of medical professionals who make trips to Latin America, primarily Honduras, to provide free health and educational services the people.

The group MEDICO has this blurb on their site describing their mission.

"Since its inception in 1990, MEDICO has devoted most of its time and resources to helping the underprivileged in Latin America, primarily in the country of Honduras."

If your looking for charities you can give donations for MEDICO in Honduras from their site.

So Erin while I couldn't get you flowers, but who knows I might get some for myself ha, I got you the best thing I could think of to send you way.

I also fixed up the rest of the templates on Erin Miller's blog so now you can see the top and side navigation from anywhere on the site. It might the nerdiest gift, but there is your time and money towards your trip. So good times for working on a blog, keep up the posts I am only checking to see if it is updated like 15 times a day.

So everyone else... Happy Valentines Day! For those in relationships enjoy a day of reminding the person you have chosen to be with why you are with them. For those who are single, everyone has been there at some point before. A special shout to Inappropriate Dave who I know will be at his third or forth Anti-Valentines day celebration in Boulder, remember no women like to be called a "behemoth" even if is followed by "your sexy".

and thats that... I am out...

UPDATE: You can also volunteer in Latin America specifically Honduras, or you can Make a Donation to help feed pregnant women in La Esperanza, Honduras.

My dog butterscotch died. I am sad. I am understanding. I am confused. I am respecting. I am here, and my dog is not.

Butterscotch was a good dog, who was having problems and I couldn't have expected to live much longer, but I still remember every time she was there for me, which during some times in the past were really important to me.

I will always miss you my dog, the first I have had from after my birth to live past her death. Part of life, but not a happy part.

I am very happy with the way my life is going.

Erin I love you.

Erin en Español para usted. S� que una de las razones que usted est� en Honduras debe mejorar su espa�ol. Soy seguro que usted est� aprendiendo mucho. Usted es uniforme fijando muchos t�tulos y comentarios en español. En mi esfuerzo de ayudar hacia fuera, le escribo esta nota. Soy seguro que ser� llenada de errores, pero esperanzadamente divertir� bastantes. Tendr� que comenzar a aprender un cierto espa�ol tambi�n. Le falto, te quiero, y espero que usted est� teniendo un rato maravilloso.

I don't really know if that says what I think it does. I tried to write simple and clear English. This was translated via babel fish. Mi no comprehendo!

MMMMmmmm Queso! Viva Honduras!

Read more to see what it looks like if you translate it to Spanish to English to Spanish to English (Amusing)...

Happy Birthday Erin, you might be far away but you are in my thoughts often.

Best of luck making the birthday chocolate chip cookies.

Hopefully I will actually get to spend some of the special occasions with you next year... hehe missing Vday, Bday, and our 1 year anniversary... Ah well I guess there are far more important things in life, and knowing how we feel about each other every day trumps the importance of any single day.

I hid your gift somewhere in Honduras...

I have had two bags of clothes that I was supposed to bring over to the Salvation Army like 3 months ago, today I finally brought them down there... One less thing on my list to worry about. One less thing in the house to keep track off.

Now I need to try to sell those tires I have on Craiglist... Dom, I should probably call you for advice because I don't even know what information I need to include about the tires, my current post would read something like,

"4 used tires, black, all the same size, $100 OBO. Booyah."

Spell check things that my spelling of Booyah should be corrected to Yahoo. That is some good advertising.

I am all trimmed up my beard, and I am in a black turtle neck. Steve Jobs on his best day doesn't have a chance to match my geeky look.

Living on a budget sucks... Realizing you need to lower your budget more sucks harder.

One day your a number one star the next day your a costly burden.

One day companies love your attention and thoughts, next your an enemy.

You can always thing about the great things you want to share and say, but it takes up a lot of time to write anything good.

I love erasing things from my to do list.

I love lists in general, such as this one.

I am far to tired to safely be writing anything... night.